[everybody knows.]

hahaha maybe it's much safer now

[i'm not angry.]

only when it's happy, i'll write.

damn i'm retarded. damn i'm useless.

my arms are aching a lot. i dont know why. but it's making me feel really weak.

i feel like i lost it, lost the ability to do something i used to be so good at. i'm still trying, and i havent stopped.

but i just get disappointed over and over again. what used to work doesnt seem to now. and i keep trying to shake it off.

sometimes i'm afraid you'll forget
sometimes i'm scared it'll be gone, just like that

i'll paint myself a perfect picture in my mind.

are you really happy?

[words that don't fit like they did.]

i chanced upon something interesting. but it's more sweet than interesting. kinda reminded me of a lot of things, got my mind off a lot of things. HAHA i'm happy for her, my dear friend.

and i'm right here, thinking about the stupid things i did. all the weird things that happened. what should i say or do to make it any better? roar. i wish wish wish wish wish i knew.

i'm feeling a little lost now. cause i really dont know what to say, or do. i dont know what i'm not doing and maybe what i'm doing.

a million thoughts, a million scenarios running through my mind, i dont know what i should say.

cause i lost my footing.

i should just stop blogging, go sleep and forget everything, haha.

GOOOOOOD NIGHT!

and i'm afraid of being alone.
_________________________________________________

and i just wanted to listen to this song again



Bright cold silver moon
Tonight alone in my room
You were here just yesterday
Slight turn of the head
Eyes down when you said
I guess I need my life to change
Seems like something's just aren't the same
What could I say?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I'll need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I stare up at the stars
I wonder just where you are
You feel a million miles away
(I wonder just where you are)
Was it something I said?
Or something I never did?
Or was I always in the way?
(Was it something I did?)
Could someone tell me what to say to just make you stay?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
Again

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
But every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again

stop being such a crazy woman lar.

[your eyes shine like pretty lights.]

ever since the school year started, things have been looking quite bad. maybe for now i'm trying hard to ignore and tell myself it'll all be over, and things will definitely be better. not everything is bad. but sometimes, i just get confused, dont know what to feel.

i think i've been so much more noisy this year. oh gosh, briana, shut up lol.

lectures have been quite boring, especially econs and chem. math and physics are pretty okay for me, since i'm filling up a lot of blanks from last year. gp can get a bit sian, but well, still surviving. oh we watched this video on north korea 2 days ago during our 2 hours gp tutorial. super interesting and enriching. learnt a lot and there was a lot of reflection after which.

to think, up to today, there are still areas in the world who live in communism and north korea has had a lot of stuff going on. i wonder how they'll pull through this economic crisis.

been studying more than i did last year and completed a lot of work. trigonometry is still a bit foggy to me, lol.

parents' night on friday and i had to usher. spent an hour plus at the carpark repeating "good evening, welcome to srjc. the reception for the JC1 parents' night is that way" over and over again to every parent walking past me. man it was tiring. lol my group disappeared after the first 45 mins to slack at the gallery. man the numbers were pretty big. twice the number of parents that came last year!

haha i haven's been online for MANY DAYS. one reason is because i'm damn freaking lazy to. i've been coming home at like 10pm every night and i'm dead tired when i'm home. so i ko at like 11 plus, or 12.

bumped into deborah on wednesday at the bowling alley when i finally went back to bowling after my toe got better. hahaha the 4/8 gathering is nearing.

this week was quite bad. sigh, stuff happened and i didnt take them too well, and i regretted after that.

so what if people are leaving. li an said friendship is like a bus ride. people from anywhere board and alight this bus, and we're constantly moving. yeah she's right. i just didnt expect my close friends to drift off like that. you know, sometimes i think it's something wrong with me. if it really is, i just really hope one of you would tell me straight in the face.

i love my sofa. lol.

[17 february, hello.]

HAHA FINALLY! AFTER 3 DAYS I CAN LOG INTO BLOGGER!

this is so cute!



3 days ago i wanted to blog, but i forgot my password. either i forgot the pw, or someone hacked my acc! LOL. finally fixed the problem! lol

this week has been a rather tiring week. hahaha i wake up in the morning and stone for 10-20 mins before i move my lazy bum...

i just received my enrolment documents from SP to biotech. rawr. i'm giving this up for the second time... lol. i dont know man. kinda sucks lar.

i have a goal now. secret :D

staying in jc, i understood what i had to go through other than listening to the lectures again. i know there will always be people who are prejudiced against us. haha i'm not looking down on repeat students, but hahaha since i came back to school, the group of us have received all sorts of crap from people and all, even the new j1s. it sucks and all, yes it does. but not everyone is like that lar, thats a bit of encouragement :)

when i chose to stay, i knew i had to be mentally prepared for a lot of things, maybe more than what i had to be prepared for last year. last year, i had to be so prepared for pw. this year, it's more. it's not just having to have the patience to do something i did again, it's the disgusting remarks i will have to receive this year. my friends tell me they can't believe i retained. they think i know everything, but honestly, who really knows what happened last year? or rather, who would know better than i do?

i gave up halfway last year. my confidence and motivation went out the window after my mid years and my energy went to pw. i started to sleep in lessons and all. when people ask me how to do some things, they asked what i knew. but there are still things i dont know.

i admit being sore about repeating and all. and well it does suck lar. but whats over is over. i want to start new and i will prove myself again like i have done so 2 years ago. i want to prove myself, to so many people. is that good? what is wrong with me man.

my new class, 1S19, is pretty awesome. haha there's li an! when i decided to leave for poly, she was one of the few people i didnt want to leave behind and all and she was trying so hard many times to persuade me to stay. oh and my class is dominated by males. we have 8 girls and 15 guys. lol. the guys only know how to suan me. suan my name, suan me for my toe, for everything luh! LOL. doh..... but all in all, i kinda find them a really nice bunch of people and hey, it was much better than i thought. i found myself laughing a lot this week thanks to them. we do really funny crazy things sometimes.

i still miss my 1S24 2008 though. we recently celebrated Ms Woo's birthday last friday and seeing them work so hard together, i do feel a bit left out. i go to A1-1 quite frequently and i see many things there. it's funny, and dramatic.... but the first time i stepped in there after SO LONG, i could see memories of michelle chasing aaron and greg around... tak kin studying in the corner of the classroom, me sitting next to him, eating my stupid chicken mayo sandwich and drinking my all time favourite iced milk tea from good news cafe. i then saw myself sitting with gwynna at the other end of the classroom, chatting and all. see myself sitting around with vera, gwynna and yuxuan, and do all sorts of fun stuff like sing the llama song! lol. really a lot of memories. i almost cried, but i didnt. after which, i still went back there, sat at the places i used to sit at, do my work till i fall asleep. li an and i were there yesterday for about half an hour, doing a bit of our work and talking about old times haha.

man, i feel like i've been sleeping for so long.

[a film without sound.]

many times i told myself to ignore it.

but for the first time today, i'm actually thinking of just giving in, giving up.

today is a thinking day for me. i thought about a lot of things, asked a lot of whys. i wonder why things have gone this way and i wonder if it's my fault

i looked back on today and asked myself what i should or shouldn't have done. and there are many things i wished i didnt have answers but my curiosity is so hungry for answers.

ignorance is bliss.

i want to talk about today but my mind's so clouded with all sorts of bad stuff and stuff that has been happening. i wished i had a clearer picture and stop deceiving myself. stop being so damn naive.

i used to think you get what you offer. in other words, you do something for someone and maybe, most probably, do that something back. i'm still living in that dream when i have so many times faced disappointment. it's becoming a habit for me to just do things for people, neglecting the consequences and i end up getting hurt. finally, i have no one to blame but myself. i start to feel guilty, and feel terrible.

it's like what the P said about falling into the same hole over and over again. is it because i keep forgetting or is it because i haven't found that other route? someone, tell me. help me.

haha how amusing. i havent blogged for days and here i am again, with negative stuff.

i havent been this negative in a while.

i ask myself what i should or shouldnt have done today. what i should or shouldnt have done yesterday. or maybe the day before, friday, thursday, etc. is this regretting? or reflecting, searching for an alternative to get me out of this mess. or maybe an answer to what's happening now.

i should stop thinking. a lot of things that were said, that happened are dawning on me now. and they aren't very good. gawd, i'm tired.

______________________________________________________

this song has been in my head for days. and it carries a lot. really a lot. both good and bad.

[a pinch of salt.]

happy cny everyone :)

happy gambling and collecting ang paos :)

learnt that quiet places are still pretty good for me to study :D went to study with Tse Siong and Moses on saturday at the LIBRARY. used to hate studying there haha. Tse Siong doesnt believe i retained =.= haha

things havent been so easy for me. and i pray hard that i'll be better soon enough. everyday is a bad day for me, which is really sad lar. i'm still looking forward to everyday to something positive. yeah, it isnt so bad, but bad enough. haha

i prolly lost a friend or two this week.

ahhh there's a moth in my room and it's circling my bag. roar. i can't kill it.

today is the first day of cny. havent done much. hmm actually i didnt even step out of the house today, at all. this morning (or rather LATE morning), woke up with a headache cause i had too much to drink last night. dressed up, wore my 45 dollar strapless dress and then played blackjack at home with my bro, mom, aunt, uncle and 9-year-old cousin. haha yeah we all gambled. then i figured i wasnt gonna go out so i changed out of it into my will run shirt and shorts and played my cousin's ds for the ENTIRE afternoon alone at home, while they all decided to go out to i dont know where. they all came home at like 7pm to watch the little nyonya big reunion while i was having problems of my own and decided to sleep it off.

haha what to do, no one to visit. honestly.

then i slept for like 2 hours earlier and woke up to stone in bed (more like laze) lol. woke up to find my dog's face in mine. Cookie was staring at me cause there was no one home to play with her and she decided to wake me up. she looked at me for a while more before retreating to the living room to lie on the sofa. i finally got up like now and here i am. real funny. i woke up and i was alone at home, AGAIN. it felt empty. and emo. but that silence was sure satisfying since i was in this emo mode that even i couldnt really comprehend. 10 minutes after i woke up, my mom called and haha well, they went to return the ds and was having dinner at newton, still not back.

gonna go out for a movie later on. cause my mom wants to watch a midnight movie. haha i dont even know what we're watching. but oh wells.

i'm tired, like really tired. i hope they know without having to ask me cause i really really really dont want to answer. sigh sigh sigh

i get fed up everytime they ask.

someone from my past is back and i dont want to have anything to do with that person anymore after what he/she said to me. simply no respect for my decision and indirectly insulted me, not to mention look down on me. i know i'm not as brilliant but i'm not as arrogant as you are.

and i hope everything will be over. i just want to be a simple girl living in a big big world. haha.

_________________________________________________



Four years later
time goes by fast
got my memories
and they will last
I try to keep it simple
cause I hate goodbyes
and I try to keep it simple
by telling myself that

I, I will remember you
and all of the things
that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
but words get in the way
So we're not together
I will remember you
I will remember you

We're a picture
In my mind
When I want to find you
I just close my eyes
You'll never be that far from me
So dont say goodbye 'cause
You'll never be that far from me
I'm telling myself

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that weve gone through
There is so much I can say
but words get in the way
So were not together
I will remember you

You were there when I needed a friend
Thank you, thank you
I never told you how much that meant
Gotta thank you, thank you

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
but words get in the way
So

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
The words get in the way
Were not together
I will remember you
We're not together
I will remember you

I will remember you

[happy birthday.]

haha, guess what? i'm 18

hee

thanks for the wishes guys and girls i love you all so so much :D

___________________________________________



You are young but so am I
And this is wrong but who am I to judge
You feel like heaven when we touch
I guess for me this is enough

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight

You are young and I am scared
You're wise beyond your years, but I don't care
And I can feel your heart beat
You know exactly where to take me

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Will you remember me?
You ask me as I leave
Remember what I said?
Oh how could I
Oh how could I forget

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight.

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight.

Ooh ooh. Ooh ooh.
Ooh ooh. Ooh ooh.
Ooh ooh. Ooh ooh.
Ooh ooh. Ooh ooh.

[2009.]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

the day is soon here...

i have a lot of things to do.

a lot of things happened over the week

and i'm tired. really tired.

the coming week will be busy.

school is gonna start next monday. hello SR!
___________________________________________

hahaha cute song



他们要我饶舌于是我就开始上课
咬的字清不清我不晓得
有些说我短舌嘴里糖果含着两颗
这绝对是我的一种特色

初一吃素初二吃素初三吃素
我饶个口令怎么让我饶得那么辛苦
我说的不清不楚只好学人家扮酷
给我一点时间让我慢慢进步或退步
不行！要怎么饶舌才会有形
不管什么形先不要给人家批评
我行只有我自己说我行
我已经说了那么多我真不相信

我该怎么做我该怎么做
怎么搞得我不知所措
这么大的问题不知不觉皱了眉头
就让他们说就让他们说
不要愁眉苦脸想太多
等我铁棒磨成针那个时候你们就懂

他们要我饶舌于是我就开始上课
咬的字清不清我不晓得
有些说我短舌嘴里糖果含着两颗
这绝对是我的一种特色

给我麦克风大家快来跟我疯
把螺丝放松双手借给我用
我不是要你跟我一起诗歌朗诵
我只需要你和我有那一点点的互动
跟我说HEY~跟我说HO~
咬字不清也能把气氛搞HIGH
所以暂时还好请不要见怪

他们要我饶舌于是我就开始上课
咬的字清不清我不晓得
有些说我短舌嘴里糖果含着两颗
这绝对是我的一种特色
他们要我饶舌于是我就开始上课
咬的字清不清我不晓得
有些说我短舌嘴里糖果含着两颗
这绝对是我的一种特色
这绝对是何维健的特色
这首是我献给你们的歌

[you belong with me.]

roar, my head is heavy. :(((

today is new year's eve! happy new year's eve!

two days ago, when i was out having brunch, i bumped into Celine. yes, she's my really really really good friend in IJ. she told me to read her latest blog post and i did. it was really touching.

i want to dedicated this blogpost to her.

Celine and i were classmates since P5, up to sec 2. hahaha we really did go through thick and thin in that 4 years. it may seem short, but a hell lot of things happened. we argued, we fought, we cried, we laughed, we had fun. we were like girlfriends and i never want to forget a friend like that. we both changed, definitely. however deep down i can still feel a connection with her and we can still go wild together like we used to. haha those were great times. i may have been unhappy in IJ cause of the people and all, but there will always be nice people i love like Celine. if possible, i still want to go wild with her 10 years later, 20 years later. and maybe when we're all old, we can still talk about harry potter. LOL yeah we both loved harry potter then. we were like creating our own harry potter fan club. that was a long time ago. lol

i miss the times we would just be lame and i remember all the times we shared in IJ. haha she's living just 2 blocks away and i hardly get to see her. Celine Chen, i miss you a lot and know that even though we're in different schools, i want you to know that i will always be there for you and i still love you a lot :D

been rollerblading for two days. super shiok. haha made a new rollerblading buddy. but i feel bad for abusing my buddy, cause i dont have to carry my own blades lol. okay mean. shut up briana!

________________________________________________

great song :) meaningful and written for a good cause. this song makes me cry



Take a breath
I pull myself together
Just another step till I reach the door
You'll never know the way it tears me up inside to see you
I wish that I could tell you something
To take it all away

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I won't give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

When I hear your voice
Its drowning in a whisper
It's Just skins and bones
There's nothing left to take
No matter what I do I can't make you feel better
If only I could find the answer
To help me understand

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I wont give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

That if you fall, stumble down
I'll pick you up of the ground
If you lose faith in you
I'll give you checkup on through
Tell me you won't give up cause I'll be waiting if you fall
Oh you know I'll be there for you

(Ahahaha)
If only I could find the answer
To take it all away

Sometimes i wish i could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I wont give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know
(Oooh)
I wish I could save you
I want you to know
(Ohohh)
I wish I could save you (ohh)

[next plane home.]

hahaha been a month since i blogger.

firstly, merry christmas to all!!!

yangshuo trip was great. made new friends like Moses, Tse Siong, Mingwei, Melissa, Rachel, Shu Xian and Gwen. i thank my group and all of you for making it a really enjoyable trip. i started out not knowing many people but i guess things did work out in the end :)

photos, go to facebook! LOL dont have them at the moment

recently went for a class gathering. 1S24 XMAS GATHERING. haha dont have the photos too... facebook!

went to chomps with SR147, my loveliest pw group. hahaha no photos yet, will post when i get them! haha

twilight was REALLY good. and i bought the book :D cant wait to start on it.

reading jodi picoult's Salem Falls and i think it's a bit boring at the start but i believe it'll be better later on.

the year has been a very eventful one.
indeed.

i dreamt of many people last night. and those people left me alone. i woke up wondering if we dream of the people we care about. no matter how much you hate them, maybe deep down inside, you care for them. then later on, something unexpected happened and i'm stuck in this dilemma, not knowing what to do or say anymore.

i dreamt of the people who hurt me, who ignored me, who thrashed me. the people who never showed me who they really were, who made me cry so much in my years of living. it started out good, but then... crashed.
___________________________________________________________

thanks to the great friend who introduced this nice song to me :D



It's her hair and her eyes today
that just simply take me away
and the feeling that i'm falling further in love
makes me shiver, but in a good way

All the times i have sat and stared
as she thoughtfully thumbs through her hair
as she purses her lips
bats her eyes
and she plays with me
sitting there, slack-jawed and nothing to say

[Chorus:]
Cos i love her with all that i am
and my voice shakes
along with my hands

Cos she's all that i see and she's all that i need
and i'm out of my league once again

It's a masterful melody
when she calls out my name to me
as the world spins around her
she laughs, rolls her eyes
and i feel like i'm falling
but it's not surprise

[Chorus]

Cos it's frightening to be
swimming in this strange sea
but i'd rather be here than on land

yes she's all that i see
and she's all that i need
and i'm out of my league

[anything but ordinary.]

lousy morning.

got scolded for nothing

labeled the lousy one for nothing.

and nobody knows.
___________________________________________



Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep
It's my lullaby
Sometimes I drive so fast
Just to feel the danger
I wanna scream
It makes me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that I
Have been to the extreme
So knock me off my feet
Come on now give it to me
Anything to make me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Let down your defences
Use no common sense
If you look you will see
that this world is a beautiful
accident, turibulent, succulent
opulent permanent, no way
I wanna taste it
Don't wanna waste it away

Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep
It's my lullaby

Is it enough?
Is it enough?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Is it enough?
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.
oh
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

[never ending.]

i saw a shooting start last night at about 430am, and i made a wish :)

went to get some stuff for the trip today and omg, it's so darn cheap at beach road.

lol nothing much lar. i watched da vinci code last night. it was, uh so chimilogy and draggy, quite boring haha.

i want a special ability.
never let the fear stop you from playing the game.

[they called me this. they called me that.]

why emo? dont emo :)

i miss my 1S24, VERY BADLY. yeah, i miss you guys so much. i hope to see them be ahpyp everyday!

and i still havent gone out with my pw group, omg

lol gonna crash sarah's lecture with li an next week

and i'm going to yangshuo soon. so much to get. and i'm prolly gonna go shopping for the stuff i need tomorrow. or rather, today.

wizards of waverly place is so darn funny lol. 2am on disney channel later!

yangshuo trip is nearing. omg, it is!

i bumped into cat, greg, jeff, gwy and yx today. i miss them so much... :(

had dinner with alwin today, it was nice :)

and i'm not feeling too good, AGAIN. sigh. always falling ill. and i keep forgetting to take my vitamin C pills, which really is trouble for me. my stomach feels like a washing machine, sigh.

shall go on my yangshuo shopping trip later and i'll gather the stuff i need tonight :D

the last time i went on a school trip to america, my mom packed for me. omg i can't let it happen again, i was 15 then. i'm 17 now, LOL.

gotta buy haversack too!

why am i blogging in sentences? I HAVE NO IDEA, LOL

and i'm so tired...

mage is level 60 now. and anthony doesnt have wotlk, roar. lol. i'm gonna quit wow soon. when school starts, i gotat give it my BEST SHOT! i wanna prove myself and get into uni :)

and hey, i'm not emoing today. hehe. zm and clispson, I'M NOT EMOING TODAY!
havent done so in the past few days i guess lol.

i'm gonna miss SRJC! although my dream school was SAJC, but i'm super proud of SR man. really. it may not be the best jc academically, but it is in many other areas and i cannot express how much i'm gonna miss it in words.

i definitely learnt a lot this year. my tutors rock.

Ms Woo was always patient with us and all, and it was great talking to her at times. although the things i do sometimes really is annoying, like i repeatedly fall asleep during econs, she always gave me the encouragement i needed and i kinda got through without breaking down.

Mrs Oh, for allowing my favourite subject, chemistry, to be so enjoyable that passion for it never died even when i was starting to do badly. i remember the time after the mid years when she personally spoke to me and told me she believed in me. i felt it, but am disappointed in myself for doing badly at the promos. i only have myself to blame because she was a great tutor indeed.

Mr Eugene Tan, who sometimes misunderstands me but pushed me further. lol if he didnt, i prolly wouldnt have passed gp. and i feel lucky i did, because i was never proud of my gp results. although i still sucked at the promos, i still want to thank him for always pushing me to seek consultations from him, and ask him for help.

Mr Jonathan Ng, my physics tutor. okay physics isn't my best subject, and yes i dislike physics (i'm sorry!) he always asked me how i was doing, whether i had problems catching up and all. and yes i appreciated it. although he's a new teacher and all, he still bonded with our class and clicked pretty okay. thanks Mr Ng, for always showing concern and helping me out wherever i needed help :)

TianXD laoshi. haha, funny fellow. but he was a really interesting teacher. he liked going out with us and haha he can be pretty innocent, which makes him quite funny lar. he liks to ask me if i'm feeling better, if i'm still sick. lol, funny guy lar. but yeah, he was a good teacher. could see his effort even though he had the accent. thanks laoshi :D

Ms Liu! although she was my chem tutor for like 6 weeks only, she was a great tutor. i enjoyed her lessons a lot and i like talking to her. when i needed help with choosing a course next year, she gave really good advice and i dont regret asking her for help. she's definitely a fun teacher and a teacher i can talk to. she played a part in making chem interesting for me and i did hope for her to be my chem tutor again after pae. lol.

alright, i think i'm gonna go watch tv, play wow and pack my stuff :D take care and cheers :D

they called me this.
and they called me that.
_________________________________________________



Watch all the flowers
Dance with the wind
Listen to snowflakes
Whisper your name
Feel all the wonder
Lifting your dreams
You can fly

Fly to who you are
Climb upon your star
If you believe you'll find
Your wings
Fly
To your heart

Touch every rainbow
Painting the sky
Look at the magic
Glide through your life
A sprinkle of pixie dust
Circles the night you can fly

Fly to who you are
Climb upon your star
If you believe you'll find
Your wings
Fly

Everywhere you go
Your soul will find a home
You'll be free to spread
Your wings
Fly

You can fly
To your heart
(Fly, fly)

Rise to the heights of all
You can be
(Fly, fly)

Soar on the hope of
Marvelous things

Fly to who you are
Climb upon your star
If you believe you'll find
Your wings
Fly

Everywhere you go
Your soul will find a home
You'll be free to spread
Your wings
Fly
You can fly
To your heart

[once upon a dream.]

zomg, alwin and i are gonna sponsor a child together. yay, so happy!

been waiting so long and finally the chance. thanks alwin, you rock :D

i still love disney =D A LOT



I know you
I walked with you once upon a dream.
I know you
The gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam
I know it's true
that visions are seldom all they seem
But if I know you, I know what you'll do
You'll love me at once
the way you did once upon a dream

Once upon a time,
I dreamed we'd be together...
In love forever.
Once upon a night,
I was wishing for a never...
A never ending.

Once upon a time,
once upon a night,
Once upon a wish,
once upon a dream...

I know you
I danced with you once upon a night
there we were wishing this dance
would last forever all time
I hope it's true
this vision is more than what it seems.
Cause if dreams come true
I know what we'll do,
we'll dance once again the way we did then upon a dream

Once upon a time
I dreamed we'd be together
in love forever.
Once upon a night
I was wishing for a never...
a never ending

once upon a time,
once upon a night,
once upon a wish,
once upon a dream...

Yeah yeah yeah yeeeah

Once upon anight I was wishing for a never ...
a never ending
once upon a time,
once upon a night,
once upon a wish,
once upon a loooovvve.

Once upon a dream (x3)

[let the sun shine on you.]

sorry for not updating for so darn long. been busy farming and exploring my new game :DD

i finally opened my world vision letter. inside was a christmas gift catalogue. not for me to buy gifts, but to donate money, and i want to...

take a look at it

http://www.worldvision.org.sg/st_Christmas_Catalogue_2008.php

and here's the catalogue =D
http://www.worldvision.org.sg/images/Christmas%20Catalogue_online.pdf

if you guys want to donate, go ahead man. it's good. you can buy a food pack for a family at S$12. you never know, like 12 bucks can make a family happy and we usually go spend like 16 bucks on buffets or 12 bucks on 2 macdonalds meals.

you can buy health screenings and hep B vaccination for a child at S$11. recently i went to get my vaccination for the yangshuo trip (hep A, typhiod and influenza, i think) and it cost me $78.65. $11 can prevent a kid from dying.

just sacrifice a portion of your allowance and you can help someone, or some family. and thats really meaningful

they even have some really cute flash animation to spread the word about helping poverished countries

http://www.worldvision.org.sg/images/ADP_1.swf

and famine camp will be in march next year!

been playing wow a lot. finally a level 60 mage and omg the new death knight is so darn cool lol. super imba lar. lol.

gotta go back to school tomorrow for cip meeting and gotta clean up the house. will update soon, i hope lol

cheers!

[wrath of the lich king.]

hello! SORRY FOR THE DELAY! had op and all lar... see lar, marcus and aaron just nagged at me today! haha joking... i wont forget you guys!

I BOUGHT WORLD OF WARCRAFT: WRATH OF THE LICH KING TODAY! YAY!!!!!

hehe...

oh yeah. have you watched reaper? it's a damn funny show. it's on channel 5, at 1030pm every sunday.


__________________________________________________



AARON NEO! my favourite son! hahaha you know what? i really almost take you as me real son lar... not in a freak way lar.. just wanted to always look out for you and be a great listener to you, as a friend, as a mama. haha! sarah has LMLD traits, you can have LMLS traits! LOL yeah. hey dont ever think you're not good enough because in my heart, you are the best son and i believe you'll do really really really well okay? i have belief in you and i know that no matter what, you will definitely find what you're looking for in life :) because i know that you're working hard. despite all the obstacles and all the setbacks, you're still working hard, i know that you will definitely get what you want at the end of everything. you will always be my favourite son okay? LOL really honored to be your mama. so proud of you, haha. know that no matter where i am, i will still want to be your mama, and you will still be my erzi! =D keep working hard, and get into uni, get a degree in the course you want. i know and believe so strongly that you can do it. do me proud, i will keep praying for you. take care my erzi :) remember the pretty mama handsome son thing? haha, yeah my son so handsome! even uncle henry has a crush on you! LOL! joking. thanks for being such a great erzi and a great friend, i won't forget you :)















MARCUS NG!! hehe thanks for being a great friend. really. you are one guy who knows most of my problems and have never stopped encouraging me. even in bowling, although i seriously suck, you still encouraged me and i really appreciate it. at least, at the end of it, i will still like bowling cause i made friends like you. even in class, you were always a great tutor when i needed help in math or chem. although i still suck, you never found me annoying and irritating. thanks for being such a great guy friend who never fails to listen to my problems and giving me good advice :) you and xue er, damn funny. but it's cute! hahaha. hey, do your best next year okay? as long as you work really really really hard, you can definitely do it. i saw how hard you worked for promos, so i have faith in you, and know that if you continue to put in all your effort, you can definitely make it there! hahaha JIAYOU OKAY? i want to see marcus ng be the best bowler and the top student, just like how i want to see all of you. i will definitely miss you guys, A LOT. you guys really did make me laugh a lot this year and i really like this fun class. remember okay? you can be my new tennis buddy! i wanna learn how to play tennis luh! haha, take care okay? i will definitely miss you guys and come back when i'm free to see you guys. work hard and i wish you all the best! love ya!



LIM ZI XIANG!!! hahahaha you are definitely one of the funniest guys i know. lol even your stony face makes me laugh! thanks, for being such a joker who never fails to cheer anyone up. i know you're always joking around, but as a friend, you are a good one. i know your friends like you not just cause you're funny, but because you do know how to lend a listening ear. haha although i havent shared much with you, but thanks you know? for being able to make me laugh even when i was at my lowest. you and yx, really compatible. you're funny and she's damn cute and funny. both of you always makes me laugh. continue being happy like you are now okay? and spread that joy to more people! next year j2 already, must not have fair conduct okay? must work super hard! jiayou! and all the best! =D

[i wanna thank you.]



LIM YU XUAN! thanks for being such a sunshine girl this whole year. lol your blurness and unglamness really does cheer me up and never fails to make me laugh. although you're always being unglam and eating SO MUCH, i think that it's really unique and special, thats why you're really unique to me. a really special friend indeed :) when i'm gone, dont change okay? i think you're really cute the way you are already. and i'll ALWAYS remember your llama song, never ever fails to crack me up! haha. continue to work hard okay? i saw you having consultation with mr kwang today and i know you'll do good at the retest!. i wish you all the best! do well for your retest okay? stay happy always and i like the simple way you are, makes me jealous. it's great being simple at times you know? promise me to always be happy, stay happy like this forever :) you know something? i like your laugh! HAHA whenever i see you laugh, it's damn funny it makes me laugh too! shows how good you are at spreading this happy aura, haha. i'm really gonna miss you a lot. remember always, that i'll be here to laugh with you anytime, anyday. stay happy always and i love you!
















TAN LI AN!!!!! haha when you told me your primary school best friend called you tan la la in the past, i found it really cute, really. and la la WAS my favourite teletubby (now, no cause i heard they're scary and evil). guess what? you're now my favourite teletubby! and i definitely know you're not scary and evil. thanks for being there for me you know? you've been the trusted friend i had in this class. even though you had your volley friends and i had my own group of friends, i never found it difficult to talk to you about anything, at all. in fact, talking to you has always been a joy. no matter where i am, i'll ALWAYS listen to you like i did during the time when we were doing our WR. i'll be your best friend now, and in the future. don't ever feel that i'm leaving you behind okay? cause even though i'm not physically there at srjc anymore, my heart is still with you guys and i'll still think of all of you. i will never forget you and the rest. thanks for being such a great companion through my pw journey. we talked, laughed, complained, gossiped so much when we were doing our pw together at night and i will never forget those times. i was really happy, to have someone close in the group, and i really want to continue being that listening ear. i know, that although i wont be able to do such a great job, since i wont be in srjc anymore, but i'll still do my best yeah? i promised you i'll come back once in a while when i can to visit you guys. i will :) i'm really glad you opened up to retaining. but remember that no matter what, you choose your path, dont let someone else do it for you. if you like art, pursue it :) i never want to see you unhappy cause a smiling li an is a pretty li an! stay happy girl, and i'll always be there for you. dont let things in school get you down. when you feel like it, just sms me okay? love you loads!



VERA HO!!! hahaha my purple carrot. you know you're really smart and hardworking? and you're so cute with gabriel! haha. thanks girl for hearing me out at times, i really really really appreciate it. hahaha it's really fun having you around as a friend and a toilet buddy. lol not say toilet buddy lar, but yeah, you get what i mean! haha. i know this whole year, you've been a lof of tough times, especially with schoolwork and the lack of time. but you proved yourself wrong and you did it! you passed your promos and you're promoting, which is good. have more confidence in yourself because you can actually do it. dont tell yourself that you cant do it, because that brings your morale down. tell yourself to "chiong arh!" and work really hard and you'll do great. i believe in you, so you must believe in yourself too okay? i'll be here using poms poms to cheer you on and the rest of the class. take care my dear, you're always falling ill. you must sleep well, eat well and dont keep stressing yourself out okay? thats how you take good care of yourself! haha jiayou my dear! all the best and i love you! i'll always be there for you when you need me, always.



SARAH YOUNG!!! haha although you left poly halfway, 1S24 will always love you, and we still do! thanks for being such a great daughter. we have a lot of LMLD traits and i think, haha thats damn cool lar. i almost treat you and aaron like my real children lar. lol! but i hardly see you, so you're like a daughter studying abroad! LOL okay... haha i enjoy poking fun at you about my son-in-law (HOHOHO) and well talking to you is really such joy. i know that we're almost identical in terms of personality, really LMLD! LOL i guess thats why we can get along so darn well. thanks you know? for always listening to me. i know the transition from jc to poly was tough for you but i've seen you grown and i think that you definitely did grow and i'm proud of you. from the time you left, you always talked to me about a lot of things that happened in school. haha i remember you were one of the few people who actually came up to tell me "i thought ij girls were all... but you're different!" that kinda touched me, really... actually it touched me a lot lol. i know you used to dislike me cause i was an ij girl and i was wild, but you eventually started to open up to me and i changed your perception, which is good! HEHE! continue to work hard in poly okay? i want to see you do really really really really well! get a gpa of 4.0, make me prouder! lol i'm already proud of you haha. jiayou okays? mama will always be here to cheer you on and listen to you anytime! i love you!

_______________________________________

oh man i dont feel so good. my nose is a mess. shall go rest. :)

[footprints in the sand.]

haha i failed my promos. i'm eligible to retain but i'm not and i'm leaving for poly. i'll be heading to Singapore Polytechnic next year, to Biotechnology. i wanna say how much i'm gonna miss my friends at SR.

from the start of this year, i made great friends like puiwah and elaine lim. i know that you two aren't gonna see this, but i still wanna express my gratitude for making friends with me. you two were the first two people who spoke to me and i'm happy to know you guys. thanks to orion 4, for making the first one week plus really enjoyable. although it was awkward having to make all of you celebrate janice's birthday, but well, haha i tried my best lar. thanks to cat, elaine foo, germaine, enling, marilyn, waheeda and janice for making that week so enjoyable and it did give me a good start in SR. thanks to jon, chunkai, aldrich, greg and siang phong for being part of a great OG.

it sucked to be separated, but we did. we all found great pae classes. and i wanna thank my second orion 4 (1S17). you guys never failed to make me laugh and enjoyed school everyday. even when i was having my gastric flu, i still insisted on going to school to see all of you, to hang out with yall after school for lunch and laugh all day with you guys. thanks siyi and wenhui for being such great companions in this class. i will never forget dsen and siyun, who always made the class so lively and noisy. haha. ristah, my purple girl, and lynette, my dearest temasek girl who wants 4 kids haha. i will never ever forget our laughing episode during our first H1 physics tutorial. marissa, my dota girl and ponning partner who constantly ponned gp and pw with me to sit in the library to slack. wenhui, my girlfriend who always sings in class and likes to look at the mirror. HAHA! i will never forget our last day of pae when we skipped the entire day of lessons to sit outside the library, just to hang out. it was fun, indeed.

1S17, you guys were the best pae class i could ever ask for and i love all of you, A LOT!











































my psp gang! aldrich, fong wai and kelvin! oh and greg! LOL how could i ever forget greg! my 四大天王s! haha if you cant read that, it's si da tian wang! hahaha yeah, greg hasnt passed down the legacy! i will never ever forget ponning lessons with you guys just to sit in the library and play burnout and bleach. i will never ever forget the four of you and how much fun we had in SR just being retarded, LOL. although greg and i are in SR, aldrich's in SP chem engineering (where i'll join him soon, LOL), fong wai's in SAJC, and kelvin's in NP, i'll always remember you guys. you guys did add a lot of sunshine in my life and made everything super fun. thank you, i miss you guys a lot.















fong wai, me















me, gregory (gaygory)















our favourite fong wai wai!















aldrich my greatest buddy ever















our si da tian wang


aldrich and fongwai messing around (if you havent noticed, their shoes)





























messing around again, as always. attempts to be gay buddies.

after jae started, i had members in my OG like jon, mok, ek, siyi, mad and fuyang. haha mok, ek, fuyang, wenhui, lijuan and i just hung around the cafe ALL DAY slacking and ponning lessons. haha yes, we go to school to pon lessons. haha. they were still good times. i wanna thank ek for telling me all the stories about my bro in sec sch which did make me laugh and always bickering with wenhui which really cracked everyone up. mok, for being such a innocent and blur fella. haha i have no idea how i ended up in a scandal with you, but oh wells. thanks for being a friend :) i guess, that was how the whole SR clique thing started. it started with myself, wenhui, lijuan, ek, mok, jerome and steph. thanks guys, i love yall.

then came the SR clique, when people started to leave. ek left for sp mass comm and fuyang drifted to his class. we were all split up. lijuan and steph in 1S31, waiting to go to nyp business and np accounting respectively. wenhui in 1S22, mok in 1S17, jerome in 1A07, and myself in 1S24. we still hung out as a group every friday until it eventually stopped. thinking back, i do miss the times when we were all so simple and we could just laugh. jon joined us and at the end of it, it was just zenda, lijuan, wenhui, steph, jon, jerome and myself. jerome drifted away and it came down to only the 6 of us. we had great times. we celebrated birthdays and we bowled together, doing something we all enjoyed, talking about the ECs and guys at school.

























































.









there came 1S24. the class that gave me strength as well as the class that hurt me. you guys went through thick and thin with me and of course, i would choose to keep the good memories with me.
















CHAN TAK KIN! haha the first person to bully me in class. so annoying. but thanks for being there for me at the start of the year, consoling me anytime, anyday when i'm upset. haha i still remember the day you brought me to the swings and that kinda cheered me up. you always stood up for me when i got bullied, i still remembered the time i got really hurt by what other people said and you were the one who cleared things up for me. although we may have drifted apart, but remember that i still regard you as a really dear friend and i'll never forget you. just continue to work hard like you have been this past year and i'm very very very sure that you'll shine at the A levels next year. i'm super sure of it. i have a lot of faith in you and dont let me down! i'm sorry for what happened halfway through this year, just know that i didnt mean it and i wish you all the best. hope you'll find talking to someone better than keeping to yourself at times. it does worry me and scares me haha. haha remember to stay happy everyday and whenever you feel like it, you can always talk to me. smile always. like i said, you look very shuai when you smile. so KEEP SMILING! stop being so dao! haha















MAX LEE! my ah pa, the class ah gong! haha my dearest class rep arh, can you please STOP SPEEDING AND TAKE CARE! SCARED THE SHIT OF OUT ME WHEN I HEAR WHAT HAPPENED LUH!!! tak kin told me you died already. LOL. i know earlier this year, we had a dispute and all. i wanna tell you that i'm sorry, and i learnt my mistake. even so, thanks for always being a great friend, and offering that listening ear when i needed it. i still remembered the time i cried so badly on the phone and you were the one who kinda worked things out for me. thanks ah pa, for everything. i hope and am sure that you and denise will be a really really really really happy couple. i'm happy to see that you've found someone and you are a happy boy, LOL. thanks for being such a great friend! continue to be that positive guy i know and trusted. take care of all my little kids when i'm gone okay!















GWYNNA HO! my girlfriend! hahaha wahhh i lost my first female kiss to you, at crossroads cafe! lol. thanks for being there for me all this while you know? if not for you, and your encouraging words, i would not have been able to find the strength. i'll be missing you like hell once i leave. you were one of the greatest friends i made at SR. really. dearest, you have definitely proved yourself worthy. you worked hard for your promos and i saw that improvement in you. you really have grown and i still believe you will one day, grow up to be someone greater. acheive your dream as a psychologist okay? i know you'll be a darn good one cause you've always been a great friend to talk to about problems and you know how to offer a warm shoulder for someone to cry on as well as a good listening ear to listen to. like i said, you've been giving me the strength to even go to school. i know that you'll be great next year. i want to see you, and everyone else do really well, and i have great faith in all of you. i believe all of you will do well, no matter what. i know it's tough on you at home, but always remember that i still love you a lot and i promise to be there for you. no matter where i am, i will still be around for you kays? like i promised li an, i will come back once in a while to visit you guys. stay strong girl, like you have all year. i'll always be there for you :)
___________________________

alright i'll stop here for today :) i shall go sleep now and reminisce about the great times :)